How To: Coach Our Guys

The guys in our lives are awesome...but sometimes they just need a little push in the right direction.
I don't know about you, but my husband grew up with all brothers and no sisters,
so I've taught him what kinds of girly things/experiences make me happy.
{Aka, I like coming home to a clean house after work, love shopping at Anthro, reading Glamour or InStyle when I'm sick, etc}
This is a guide on how to coach our guys so they feel comfortable being spontaneous with gifts or acts of service that will sweep us off our feet and make us feel loved.
No more making our guys mind read!

1. Don't say "I'm training *insert guy name*"
 It's Always Referred to as COACHING
I made this mistake once & Ryan retorted that it sounded like I was teaching a dog how to pee.
Now it's coaching, because it sounds like I'm helping him with the playbook!
{Much more manly}

2. Subtle Isn't Going to Cut It
I don't know if you've noticed...but guys like to mentally check out.
If you like a particular dress or necklace, point it out and say something to this effect:
"This is totally my style and I think it would be suuuuuper cute for Valentines!"
To us girls, that seems completely obvious and over the top.
Our guys will read this as subtlety, and mentally file it away for later.

3. Short & Sweet
After I point out something that catches my eye, I give a short & sweet explanation as to why I like it.
If it's a flower arrangement?
I point out the particular flowers and colors that I like & educate him on the topic.
That way, he feels more comfortable going solo and picking something out for me that I'd like, instead of him being scared to even go in the store for fear of not knowing what to get or even where to start.

4. It's All About Affirmation!
When Ryan goes out of his comfort zone to get me something cute from Anthro or to take me to a girly movie, I make a point to genuinely thank him for surprising me and tell him what I loved about the gift, experience, or act of service.
Yet again, he will file this away in his noggin and keep in mind to do something like that again.

5. Re-Group
If Ryan is a little "off" this time around, I don't lie to him!
I commend him for his thoughtfulness and give him more pointers to work with.
We make a date out of returning something and having him help pick out what I get next :)
When you are out on dates make sure to be short & sweet & to the point!

Romantic Gestures

The past two nights I have worked 6 hour closing shifts until 10:30 at night.

It's been pretty brutal with the new holiday hours.

After the evening being pretty tame, my co-worker and I figured it would be so until closing.

Ohhh we were wrong!

The last hour of the mall being open we had at least 15 people stuffed into our little store and the adults and little kids were just touching everything we had strategically put back in place.

Which meant that we were also scurrying around the store putting things back together 

so we wouldn't be there all night!

I came home to see my cute husband standing at the door to greet me with a hug.

He then told me to put my stuff down, grabbed my hand and took me over to the dining room where I saw a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

I totally started tearing up & had tears strolling down my face uncontrollably.

My husband is a very straightforward manly man.

Grand romantic gestures are just something that doesn't come to him naturally.

He shows love by cleaning my car, making me dinner, or fixing the faucet I've been complaining about.

But he knows I love those romantic gestures and even though it is not particularly in his nature,

 he went out of his way to do something sweet that is more my love language than his. 

Which is why I started tearing up when I saw the flowers.

They have so much more meaning than just a sweet gesture.

He then led me into the kitchen and proudly showed off the lasagna he had made.

He served up my share and we sat down and talked about our night with each other.

My heart still hasn't come down from floating around with the clouds :)